So yesterday was Father's Day, and even though I haven't had to purchase a commemorative card since 1987, I didn't want to let the occasion slip by without acknowledging the old artificer in some way…

Lucky Strikes
Lava Soap
A shiny Zippo lighter with a distinctive clink
Strohs Beer
Scrambled eggs
Breakfast in the park
Vitalis
Johnny Cash
Laughing at Hogan's Heroes after dinner
Seagram's 7
7 o'clock Mass
Baseball crackling on the radio
Christmas trees
Boston Cream Pie
Proud to be a Marine
Korea
The Blue Velvet
A Sohio Service Station on the corner of Mayfield and Wilshire
Shoe polish
Fingernail brush
Ten-speed bikes for graduation
The gospel according to St. Jack:  

“I'm busier than a cat covering shit at fly time.”
“Spoken like a man with a paper ass sitting over a bonfire.”  
“If my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle.”
“Jesus H. Christ on a crutch!”
“It's colder than a well-digger's ass in the Yukon.”
“When I die, just put me on the tree lawn in a Hefty bag.”  
“I hope some day I can grow up to be as smart as you.”  
“Am I gonna have gas tomorrow? Depends on what I eat for dinner tonight.” (in response to an irate customer during the 70's gas shortage)  
“All I want for Christmas is peace and quiet.”
“All I want for my birthday is peace and quiet.”
“All I want for Father's day is peace and quiet.”
​
Jack Collins rest in peace and quiet.

Today's Happy Medium Song of the Day is “Listen to Your Father,” a solo recording by Feargal Sharkey, who was better known as the distinctive voice of The Undertones from Co. Derry in Northern Ireland.